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About Me I am definitely one that sees the cup as half empty. I have decided to write a blog due to a lot of unexpected events that seem to happen in my life and to share some of my random thoughts/rants and product reviews. Not to mention I’m trying to embrace my new milestone of *clearing throat* 30. Sucks. I guess aging is inevitable just like death; however, it doesn’t mean I have to welcome it with open arms. The past couple of years have been extremely trying and it doesn’t seem to be letting up. When I catch a break another obstacle arrives. Finances, stalkers, haters, toxic friends, family issues, job woes,etc. Stay tuned to my life unpredicted. Not all bad but definitely not all good. Continuing to weather the storm….
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Happy Thanksgiving

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Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I wish you all a wonderful holiday.

Ghost Caught on Camera

ghosts(2)

This is so creepy it’s ridiculous. I can’t explain it and I definitely believe in ghosts. What do you think about the video? Some things make you question your sanity….

Out of Control Woman – Funny Crap

Shocked-Face

Eat it or Die!! WTF?!!! I say Damn….. *Running away*

Interesting History – Origins of a Few Sayings

Very Interesting

They used to use urine to tan animal skins, so families used to all pee in a pot & then once a day it was taken & sold to the tannery…….if you had to do this to survive you were “Piss Poor”.

But worse than that were the really poor folk who couldn’t even afford to buy a pot……they “didn’t have a pot to piss in” & were the lowest of the low.

The next time you are washing your hands and complain because the water temperature isn’t just how you like it, think about how things used to be.

Here are some facts about the 1500s:

Most people got married in June because they took their yearly bath in May, and they still smelled pretty good by June.. However, since they were starting to smell . ….. . Brides carried a bouquet of flowers to hide the body odor. Hence the custom today of carrying a bouquet when getting married.

Baths consisted of a big tub filled with hot water. The man of the house had the privilege of the nice clean water, then all the other sons and men, then the women and finally the children. Last of all the babies. By then the water was so dirty you could actually lose someone in it.. Hence the saying, “Don’t throw the baby out with the bath water!”

Houses had thatched roofs-thick straw-piled high, with no wood underneath. It was the only place for animals to get warm, so all the cats and other small animals (mice, bugs) lived in the roof. When it rained it became slippery and sometimes the animals would slip and fall off the roof… Hence the saying “It’s raining cats and dogs.”

There was nothing to stop things from falling into the house. This posed a real problem in the bedroom where bugs and other droppings could mess up your nice clean bed. Hence, a bed with big posts and a sheet hung over the top afforded some protection. That’s how canopy beds came into existence.

The floor was dirt. Only the wealthy had something other than dirt. Hence the saying, “Dirt poor.” The wealthy had slate floors that would get slippery in the winter when wet, so they spread thresh (straw) on the floor to help keep their footing. As the winter wore on, they added more thresh until, when you opened the door, it would all start slipping outside. A piece of wood was placed in the entrance-way. Hence: “a thresh hold”.

(Getting quite an education, aren’t you?)

In those old days, they cooked in the kitchen with a big kettle that always hung over the fire.. Every day they lit the fire and added things to the pot. They ate mostly vegetables and did not get much meat. They would eat the stew for dinner, leaving leftovers in the pot to get cold overnight and then start over the next day. Sometimes stew had food in it that had been there for quite a while. Hence the rhyme: Peas porridge hot, peas porridge cold, peas porridge in the pot nine days old.

Sometimes they could obtain pork, which made them feel quite special. When visitors came over, they would hang up their bacon to show off. It was a sign of wealth that a man could, “bring home the bacon.” They would cut off a little to share with guests and would all sit around and “chew the fat”.

Those with money had plates made of pewter. Food with high acid content caused some of the lead to leach onto the food, causing lead poisoning death. This happened most often with tomatoes, so for the next 400 years or so, tomatoes were considered poisonous.

Bread was divided according to status. Workers got the burnt bottom of the loaf, the family got the middle, and guests got the top, or the “upper crust”.

Lead cups were used to drink ale or whisky. The combination would

Sometimes knock the imbibers out for a couple of days. Someone walking along the road would take them for dead and prepare them for burial. They were laid out on the kitchen table for a couple of days and the family would gather around and eat and drink and wait and see if they would wake up. Hence the custom of holding a wake.

England is old and small and the local folks started running out of places to bury people. So they would dig up coffins and would take the bones to a bone-house, and reuse the grave. When reopening these coffins, 1 out of 25 coffins were found to have scratch marks on the inside and they realized they had been burying people alive… So they would tie a string on the wrist of the corpse, lead it through the coffin and up through the ground and tie it to a bell. Someone would have to sit out in the graveyard all night (the graveyard shift) to listen for the bell; thus, someone could be “saved by the bell” or was considered a “dead ringer”.

And that’s the truth….Now, whoever said History was boring ! !

Parrot Dances to Whip My Hair

This bird is hilarious! He’s got more rhythm than a lot of people I know.

How you Know you have Messed up Parents

I laughed but I’m sure these kids will be scarred for life after this.

Jokes – How to Start a Fight

laugh

How to Start a Fight

One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift…
The next year, I didn’t buy her a gift.
When she asked me why, I replied,
“Well, you still haven’t used the gift I bought you last year!”
And that’s how the fight started…..

______________________________

My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed.
I turned to her and said, ‘ Do you want to have sex? ‘
“No, ” she answered. I then said,
“Is that your final answer? ”
She didn’t even look at me this time, simply saying, “Yes.”
So I said, “Then I’d like to phone a friend.”
And that ‘ s when the fight started….

________________________________

I took my wife to a restaurant.
The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.
“I’ll have the rump steak, rare, please.”
He said, “Aren’t you worried about the mad cow?”
“Nah, she can order for herself.”
And that’s when the fight started….

________________________________

My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she
kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.
I asked her, “Do you know him?”
“Yes”, she sighed,
“He’s my old boyfriend…. I understand he took to drinking right after we
split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn’t been sober since.”
“My God!” I said, “Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?”
And then the fight started….

________________________________

When our lawn mower broke and wouldn’t run, my wife kept hinting to me
that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take
care of first, the shed, the boat, making beer…. Always something more
important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point.
When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily
snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for
a short time and then went into the house.. I was gone only a minute, and
when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, “When you finish
cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway.”
The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.
..

________________________________

My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, “What ‘ s on TV?”
I said, “Dust.”
And then the fight started…
.

________________________________

Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and
slipped quietly into the garage I hooked up the boat up to the van, and
proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly
undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife’s back, now with a
different anticipation, and whispered, “The weather out there is terrible.”
My loving wife of 5 years replied, “And, can you believe my stupid husband
is out fishing in that?”
And that ‘ s how the fight started…
.

________________________________

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, “I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.”
I bought her a bathroom scale.
And then the fight started…..

________________________________

After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social Security.
The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver ‘ s License to verify my age.
I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home.
I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come back later.
The woman said, “Unbutton your shirt”.
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, “That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me”  and she
processed my Social Security application..
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social Security office…
She said, “You should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten disability, too. ”
And then the fight started…

________________________________

My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
She was not happy with what she saw and said to me,
“I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly.
I really need you to pay me a compliment. ”
I replied, “Your eyesight ‘ s damn near perfect.”
And then the fight started….

Turtle Helping a Friend in Need

Everyone who knows me knows I love turtles. I thought this was really cute. :) Aww….

Woman Bangs a Door – NSFW

WTF?!!! Go buy a toy. The better question is: Why is she doing this at work. *face palm*

McDonald’s Monopoly Game is Back!!

Monopoly

It’s that time of year to play again. I actually wasted around $4.00 today because although the game officially started today, the two places I bought food from didn’t have the games pieces on any of the food. Bastards! I never win and the online game is rigged (check my posts from 2009) but it’s still fun….

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