Psychiatrist Visit
I had someone contact me asking how my visit went and it was interesting to say the least. I was not expecting the visit to go well at all. Not to mention, my doctor had a cold and was sniffing and blowing his nose the whole time. I just wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible. It was a little awkward because he was really attractive so I didn’t want to keep looking at him. The whole office has female doctors and he’s the only male there. My counselor suggested I go see him and it just lucked out that that’s who I got.
He asked me the usual stuff like why are you here and were you referred. I of course told him how I was there on my own accord and then went into my spill of being depressed for around 15 years. He then asked if I drank or did drugs and I told him no. He asked if I had kids and I told him no again. He was like, “Good, good.” Too funny. The doc asked what I did for a living and other boring stuff to get a picture of who I am. I even told him about my sister’s ailments as well since some things are genetic. I told him how my moods are pretty much low all the time. I have good days where I want to go out and do things but not very often and I’m always tired even though I sleep a lot. My work has suffered because I can’t concentrate on anything. I also explained how I sleep my days away and how I don’t have the motivation to do anything. I’m basically emotionally numb in a way.
He then diagnosed me as dysthymic. I had never heard of it and he said it is chronic depression. I looked it up and I’ve experienced a lot of the symptoms for over two years so I guess that’s why he gave me the diagnosis. He then began to ask me questions which told me he was trying to see if I was bipolar. He asked had I done things on impulse or done things I regretted. I had to tell him yeah because I buy things to make myself feel better. I also mentioned how I have slept with people I now regret but to me that shouldn’t be indicative of anything because a lot of people do that. His eyes shot up at my comments and he commenced writing. *laughing* Oh well. I also told him how I do have moments of clarity where I don’t sleep a lot and my mind is so clear. This is where I do my best writing and am the most creative. I hope that is not hypomania. Hmm….
He wanted to put me on Lexapro because I told him how I have now developed anxiety when it comes to heights. He said this would help with the depression and anxiety. He had offered Wellbutrin before but I didn’t want that one because he said it wasn’t safe to take during pregnancy. My husband and I had planned to have kids but I don’t think that’s going to happen. I would rather be safe than sorry. The doc then prescribed me Zoloft at 50mg. I am to take half a pill each day for the first week and then take them normally after that. I see him again in three weeks.
I read that if someone is bipolar that just taking an antidepressant without a mood stabilizer causes a hypomanic episode so I’m hoping I don’t have that but I guess I will know in due time. It really sucks. I’m healthy otherwise and I hate taking medicine. I’m actually angry at the fact that I might need drugs just to have a normal life. The issue for me is that I’ve been down for so long that I won’t be able to distinguish the difference between a normal mood or hypomania. It’s going to be an interesting ride. I’ve found a wealth of knowledge on depressionforums.org. If anyone has used the drug Zoloft and has some input please let me know. Thanks.
